Closure.
Most of us, (at least the relatively sensitive ones) are always busy reasoning things out. WHY is the most frequently asked and yet the most painful question to cross our minds every day. Because while everything else may be the crystal clear, facts may have been laid bare, the 'Why' is often left unanswered, which inevitably makes us chase it even more.
Closure, is essentially, the answer to this why. And the problem is, as much as you may need it from someone else, you're unlikely to find it anywhere but within yourself. People who leave you with questions, will never feel obliged to answer them anyway. No one else can ever be responsible for your inner peace. Although we'd always like our happiness to be completely independent of other people, that is not always practically possible, and you needn't blame yourself for that. It's only natural. Anyone who isn't entirely self absorbed, will find happiness in the people they love, and honestly, I think you've to be completely heartless not to.
The problem isn't associating your happiness with other people, it's blaming them for your unhappiness. What happens to you is not in your hands, and how you feel about it isn't either, but how long you choose to let that feeling consume you is in your hands entirely. When something bad happens, you're bound to feel rejected and upset and mourn a little. Loss is almost like a physical pain sometimes, so you can't help but feel the way you feel, and there is NOTHING wrong with it. The first step to recovering is recognizing that there's a problem, and accepting how you feel about it. You need to accept your agony first to eventually be able to reject the pain. Then you need to stop wishing that everything would get fixed automatically on it's own, because it will not, and it shouldn't. Throwing your hands up and wishing for miracles is leaving your life to the mercy of the unknown, I mean why would you even want to take that risk?
Saying I don't know doesn't mean you actually don't know, you just don't want to accept what you know, it's simple. I don't know is really no state of mind. Accept what you need to do, as much as it sucks right now, it'll get better because there's nothing to lose anymore. If something feels like unfinished business, you need to finish that business and not wait for a sign from the universe. Don't dive into the sinking ship because that was your ship once, that's not bravery but foolishness.
Figure out what it is that you need to feel better, and do it, every day, over and over, till you actually feel better, and believe me you will. Just as the glory wasn't permanent, the pain isn't either. Save yourself, from the misery inflicted upon you by the world, and mostly inflicted upon by yourself.
Choose yourself. You will survive each time anyway. All you need to do, is learn to survive better. And if at all, you happen to be at the giving end and not the receiving end of the pain, don't let another soul suffer due to your indecisiveness. Ending is never happy, but it sure can be peaceful. Don't ever let another person live with the kind of pain you couldn't bear. Be a good person, it really costs nothing.
Most of us, (at least the relatively sensitive ones) are always busy reasoning things out. WHY is the most frequently asked and yet the most painful question to cross our minds every day. Because while everything else may be the crystal clear, facts may have been laid bare, the 'Why' is often left unanswered, which inevitably makes us chase it even more.
Closure, is essentially, the answer to this why. And the problem is, as much as you may need it from someone else, you're unlikely to find it anywhere but within yourself. People who leave you with questions, will never feel obliged to answer them anyway. No one else can ever be responsible for your inner peace. Although we'd always like our happiness to be completely independent of other people, that is not always practically possible, and you needn't blame yourself for that. It's only natural. Anyone who isn't entirely self absorbed, will find happiness in the people they love, and honestly, I think you've to be completely heartless not to.
The problem isn't associating your happiness with other people, it's blaming them for your unhappiness. What happens to you is not in your hands, and how you feel about it isn't either, but how long you choose to let that feeling consume you is in your hands entirely. When something bad happens, you're bound to feel rejected and upset and mourn a little. Loss is almost like a physical pain sometimes, so you can't help but feel the way you feel, and there is NOTHING wrong with it. The first step to recovering is recognizing that there's a problem, and accepting how you feel about it. You need to accept your agony first to eventually be able to reject the pain. Then you need to stop wishing that everything would get fixed automatically on it's own, because it will not, and it shouldn't. Throwing your hands up and wishing for miracles is leaving your life to the mercy of the unknown, I mean why would you even want to take that risk?
Saying I don't know doesn't mean you actually don't know, you just don't want to accept what you know, it's simple. I don't know is really no state of mind. Accept what you need to do, as much as it sucks right now, it'll get better because there's nothing to lose anymore. If something feels like unfinished business, you need to finish that business and not wait for a sign from the universe. Don't dive into the sinking ship because that was your ship once, that's not bravery but foolishness.
Figure out what it is that you need to feel better, and do it, every day, over and over, till you actually feel better, and believe me you will. Just as the glory wasn't permanent, the pain isn't either. Save yourself, from the misery inflicted upon you by the world, and mostly inflicted upon by yourself.
Choose yourself. You will survive each time anyway. All you need to do, is learn to survive better. And if at all, you happen to be at the giving end and not the receiving end of the pain, don't let another soul suffer due to your indecisiveness. Ending is never happy, but it sure can be peaceful. Don't ever let another person live with the kind of pain you couldn't bear. Be a good person, it really costs nothing.
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